So there was a decision I had to make a little more than a year ago. I really didn't know what I should do. I prayed and prayed and I was not getting an answer. The thought just kept coming to me that I needed to take a couple steps forward. I needed to make the decision and then God would let me know if it was right.
I didn't like this. I said to myself, "If God would just tell me what to do, I will do it."
Obedience. I can do that. I try to do that.
Choices on the other hand, I do not enjoy.
While I was having this internal battle with myself I went to a church meeting where I learned a very valuable lesson. The speaker somehow knew exactly what I needed to hear. She was talking about agency. She said that if we are wishing that God would just tell us what to do rather than choosing it for ourselves, then we are choosing Satan's plan.
Let me repeat that.
When we wish that God would just tell us what to do rather than choosing it for ourselves, we are choosing Satan's plan.
Wow. That hit me like a ton of bricks. I had been wishing for Satan's plan! The reason why Lucifer became the devil was because he wanted to take away our agency and force us to make the right choices. I wanted God to take away my agency and just tell me what to do in the situation. I was wanting Satan's plan instead of God's plan.
Agency. The ability to choose. One of God's greatest gifts to us, His Children.
Doctrine & Covenants 58:26-28
26 For behold, it is not meet that I should command in all things; for he that is compelled in all things, the same is a slothful and not a wise servant; wherefore he receiveth no reward.
27 Verily I say, men should be anxiously engaged in a good cause, and do many things of their own free will, and bring to pass much righteousness;
28 For the power is in them, wherein they are agents unto themselves. And inasmuch as me do good they shall in nowise lose their reward.
With this new perspective, I am learning to love making choices. I know that God has given us this wonderful gift. I know that agency makes us grow. And it makes us appreciate our decisions more. I know that a lot of times in our lives, he trusts us to make the right choice. I know that I am a lot more likely to love and enjoy something if it was my own choice rather than someone forcing me to do it. I also know that as we use our agency to make good, righteous, wonderful choices, God will reward us more than we can ever imagine. We will start to become like Jesus Christ. I love my Heavenly Father. I love my Savior Jesus Christ.